My Weight Loss Story

I'm not really sure where to begin....

I guess it all starts where others have already been, a teenager, standing in the mirror, admiring my body, wondering if others will like it, if I'm the right size, the right build.

In high school I was a 130 lbs, size 10, and very conscious of my weight. I was also ashamed of what I weighed. I always felt too fat. My mother was not the best role model when it came to body image. I grew up listening to her call her own 140ish body, fat, and her most asked question was, "does this make me look hippy?" I don't blame my mom for her skewed ideas on what was healthy, I blame the media and what-not.

When I married @ 18, I found a new freedom, the freedom to eat any and all foods. My mom had kept a close check on my eating habits, and wasn't afraid to tell me when I didn't need to eat something. Again, I'm not writing a post bashing my mom, simply trying to explain that this new freedom lead me to averaging about 10 new pounds a year. By the time I became pregnant with my second child @ the age of 24, I was sitting around 180, size 14/16.

After the birth of a beautiful 9 pound baby boy, and the new job of a SAHM, I became accustomed to my new body of 200 pounds, size 18/20. My second child is wonderful, yet he does require a great deal of attention, and I've always had the feeling of never catching up to him, always running behind him, but never taking any "me" time in the process. I always told myself I'd lose that weight, but a year went by and it stayed there. Two years, three, four, five, and six which topped me off around 220, size 20.

I had worked out on and off, even losing weight and getting back down into a size 16 in hopes of donating a kidney to my mom. When she passed away, however, my reasons for working out passed away as well.

I was graced with my third child @ the age of 31, 220 pounds, size 20. While pregnant I made the decision that THIS time I was losing this baby weight. I was not settling for anything else. When I gave birth to Maddie I had hit 245 lbs. Within 3 days I was down to 213. Within 5 months I was below 200. A year later I sit around 180. I've removed a total of 65 pounds from the day I gave birth to my daughter, 45 of that, pre-preggo weight.

I became a runner 124 days ago, and it's here that I've had my greatest success. It seems the body doesn't like to run with fat on it and will quickly shed it away when given the chance. I ran religiously for 2 months straight, 6 days a week. My knees were killing me. I was over trained. I reached 178 pounds and found myself starving almost continuously. I decided to back off and give myself some time to recover. I didn't realize just how much it would effect my body. I gained an inch back to my waist and about 3 to 5 pounds. I'm not too happy about it.

Now, let's stop here. I know this post, so far, has been about weight loss, and that's definitely where I've come from, but now, today, it's a shift toward fitness, and being the best runner I can be. If you've read my posts, you've noticed a trend in my awe inspiring moments due to running, how it's a life changing experience for me, and it is. I've still not captured, in words, what running gives me and my family, however, by the time I'm 50 I hope to be able to write a book about it all...How God Changed My Life Through Running. Be on the look out for it, seriously. :) But until then, simply know that even though I'll be watching the scales, my main focus will be on speed runs, distance, and pace.

Alright then, we've come to a nice stopping place. Tomorrow, hopefully, I'll share more about my goals to a fitter me. I'll also share some insight into the new Body After Baby Project that I've joined.