Thursday, April 4, 2013

Yep, My Kid Drops The F-Bomb

Disclaimer: This post contains words some may find offensive. 

As a preschool teacher I'm able to bite my tongue 95% of my day, however,
 the other 5%, when I'm at home relaxing, is my time, and many times my language becomes flavorful. I don't feel my choice of words are over the top or disrespectful, but words such as "shit" and "holy shit" do fly out of my mouth enough times to know I use them daily on occasion

Now, out of 4 children, only 1, so far, has decided to pick up my foul mouth and begin using her own freedom of speech to express her wants/needs/comments. For example, Maddie picked up our cat, GiGi, danced her around and then in a little kitty voice said, "What the fuck, Maddie?" That's right...she totally did. My mouth fell open and I instantly looked at her dad and said, "I don't say that!" I then turned to my 4 year old daughter and nicely explained that the word, "fuck," is not ok for her to say and if I hear her say it again, she was getting a spanking.

Now, you may think I jumped overboard and went straight to captial punishment without first giving her the chance to monitor herself, but, let's back up for a moment. This little language has been going on for a couple months now and honestly, I'm just sick of it! The other day Maddie made the comment, "that damn bird just flew over my head." And then this past gorgeous weekend when we were outside, Maddie heard some teenage boys walking up the road, and she quickly giggled and said, "Momma, that boy said shit." I responded with, "yes, Maddie, I know, but we don't say that word." Her only response, "Momma I didn't say shit, that boy did!"

So true. So true.

So, here I am, a wonderful mother of a wonderful, foul mouthed, sailor drinking, pot smoking kid. Ok, so not really, but still, every time I hear her spout off one of these words I totally imagine her sitting in a bar, drunk, with a cigarette slanted out of the corner of her mouth. Come on, Life, what do ya do when your kid starts cussing? Spank? Yell? Or simply move to a country that doesn't understand English and just smile every time your kid opens her mouth and vomits out profanity? going to get my passport.

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